AAAARgh!!!!!! E30 not working - 5 s*dding days before Snett!

[jdening]

So, we're nearly ready - cutting the windows at the moment to fit.

And, I had a huge stroke of luck - a few weeks ago, the farmer down the road pulled over and asked what me and the Jimmster were doing in a garage with an E30 in bits. Turns out he's a total E30 fanatic - has 12 currently (yes, twelve) - mainly late model 325 sports or cabriolets, and his hobby is to buy them, do them up and resell them.

And, hearing of my brake concerns, kindly sources me a newer M/Cylinder.

So, yesterday, I pulled the E30 out of the garage, and into the yard to clean it and vacuum out all the rubbish from the floorpan. That goes fairly swimmingly, and Jimmy turns up in time for us to pop it back in the workshop. Time is around 6pm. Jimmy then changes the m/cyl and we bleed the brakes quickly, before firing up the car to do a final check. Flip the master switch, press the button, starter motor whirs and....

.,...and.....

...and...

...and...keeps whirring. With no nice internal combustion sounds. Nothing. Nada.

I look at Jimmy. He looks at me. He waggles a few things and we try again. Still nothing.

Now, I've had the ECU apart, to get the s/num to think about ordering a super chip, and whilst it's back on the car, it's just dangling in the driver's footwell. So, I'm thinking, it must be the ECU. Bugger. Anyway, we take it out, check everything, look at the wiring loom - actually my biggest worry, cos if we've pulled a wire apart in that, we're well fecked - and still nothing.

Next, we go back to basics - voltage at the coil? Nope. Hmmm. So, we go through the checklist of other stuff:

Spark plug out, and check for sparks - nothing.
Fuses - find one blown (stereo, OBC, glovebox lights) - replace. Nothing
Distributor cap - connections well worn, and Jimmy convinced that's the problem, but no voltage at the rotor.

IT's now 10.30pm, and I need more wine. I feed the Jimmy with SHepherds Pie and we look at each other rather glumly.


Buggeration.

[Stuart]

James.........I feel your pain. Terrible luck and yet you still manage to make light of it. Buggeration is a great word too, good work :thumb: